From Peer to Leader — Navigating the Awkward Transition with Heart
28 April 2025 A mindset shift to start your week with courage and connection
Hello you, welcome to another Monday moment with Coach Ed.
Today we are tackling one of the trickiest little pivots in the working world: the move from peer to leader.
One day you are sharing memes in the group chat. The next, you are leading the performance reviews.
Bit of a plot twist.
Friendships shift. Conversations carry a new weight. You might start second-guessing everything — wondering whether to lean in or step back.
But here is the good news: 👉 You do not need to become someone else to lead well.
In fact, the best leaders bring their whole selves into the room. Slightly awkward transitions and all.
🧠 The Mindset Shift:
From Mate to Manager — with Heart, Not Distance
When stepping into leadership, especially with former peers, it is tempting to swing to extremes. Some go rigid. Others retreat into awkward silence.
Neither feels quite right, does it?
What if you led with warmth and clarity — not force or formality?
Here’s how to manage the shift without turning into a walking HR manual:
✅ Communicate with integrity. Be open about the change. You are stepping into a new role, not a new personality.
✅ Lead with empathy and compassion. Acknowledge the strangeness. You are all figuring it out.
✅ Set expectations with clarity and kindness. Boundaries matter. But think velvet rope, not barbed wire.
✅ Keep a sense of humour. Nothing breaks tension like a good laugh — and you will need one.
✅ Stay authentic. You were trusted with this role for a reason. Lead from who you are, not who you think you should be.
🧭 Coach Ed Values in Motion
🌀 Authenticity — You do not need a leadership persona. Just a bit of courage and a clean shirt.
⚖ Integrity — Say what you mean. Do what you said you would do. Simple, not always easy.
🫶 Empathy — It is odd for them too. You are all adjusting.
🌱 Compassion — Growth takes time. Give it to yourself and to others.
😄 Humour — When in doubt, laugh (quietly, if in a meeting).
📚 This Week’s Recommendations
Some handpicked gems to help you navigate the shift:
📘 Book: The Making of a Manager by Julie Zhuo A gentle, honest guide to finding your feet in leadership — especially when managing mates.
📄 Article: How to Manage Your Former Peers — Harvard Business Review Straight-talking advice from leaders who have made the leap without losing the plot.
🎧 Podcast: Dare to Lead with Brené Brown Start with her episodes on vulnerability and courage in leadership. Because being brave beats being bulletproof.
📩 Like what you are reading?
This newsletter is my Monday check-in with those of you finding your feet in leadership and life.
If you are not already subscribed — consider this your very Irish nudge: Subtle, polite, and genuinely meant.
Each Monday we start again. With purpose, perspective, and a pinch of personality.
You have got this. And I have got you.
With warmth and a wry smile,
Coach Ed Leadership & Mindset Coach
Dublin ✈ Brazil ✈ Wherever life leads
[@coached.ie] | [www.coach-ed.ie]